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> What Are You Asking? -April 2007
 


Tom Ehrich
Tom Ehrich

 
   

What are You asking?

Pastor, Author and Speaker Tom Ehrich responds to
your questions about God, faith and
living spiritually

Send us your questions


 

APRIL 2007


Some believe once saved, always saved. Some believe you can lose your salvation. Isaiah 45:17 uses the word “everlasting.” I wonder if the thought of losing my salvation would mean Jesus would need to die on the cross again? I am quite confused. Please shed some light on this.

Salvation is a gift from God, not an accomplishment of our doing. We don’t earn God’s favor by anything we do or say; nor can we deter God from loving us. Jesus died once for all, and whether you or I accept his sacrifice, the gift has still been given. In that sense it is indeed “everlasting.” What might not be so enduring is our willingness to accept Jesus as Lord and to live as he wanted us to live. In that sense, we turn ourselves away from God. One critical act of faith, therefore, is repentance, that is, changing our minds and turning again to the Lord.

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The church I attend is the first church I have ever been to where I feel that God's Grace and Love is transforming the people who attend. They are generous-spirited, kind-hearted people... But the Church is evangelical and fundamentalist....The minister says I (and sites like this) are practicing "pick & mix religion," that all scripture is God Breathed and thus totally reliable and that those of other Faiths, and people like me, may be sincere in our version of faith but we are "sincerely wrong." The things I read here make sense to me, but it is very hard to resist the absolutes I am presented with at church. And hard to turn away from a church where so much seems so right.


I understand that it can be confusing when you see a church doing much good but hear words that sound scornful and unreasonable. In my experience, a mature pastor would encourage you to explore and to bring your questions and observations to church, to share with others. God isn't the least offended
when we think for ourselves and use all of the gifts that God gave us,
including inquiring minds. Faith is an exploration, not a rote acceptance of
formulas and absolutes.

If you feel your freedom of thought being threatened here, you could seek
out another congregation in which good is done and thought is encouraged.

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Years ago, my wife left me on the floor to die. How can I forgive her if she has not asked me to?

Forgiveness is a gift we give, to God, to the other person and to ourselves. By forgiving the other, you remove an obstacle between yourself and God. You give to the other “without counting the cost,” just as Jesus advised. And you give yourself a measure of freedom from unresolved conflict and hard feelings. If the other doesn’t reciprocate, you have lost nothing.

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I am an Orthodox Christian from India…The Hindus say, “Aham Brahmasmi”—“I am God or Brahma.” We say that we are sons of God. We also acknowledge the Spirit within. Both decry the separatist forces of the ego—or the me—as what alienates us from God. But the traditional church says that salvation is only through these churches that have a direct lineage from the apostles, and the Holy Spirit is passed through their laying on of hands. Somehow, I cannot believe that the Spirit is subject to the clergy. Jesus said that the Spirit is like the wind and no one knows whither he comes/goes.

Apostolic tradition mainly relates to the laying on of hands at ordination, not to the giving of the Holy Spirit in general. The belief in traditional churches is that ordained ministries date back to the first apostles and derive their unique authority from the unbroken chain of “apostolic succession” through Peter and on to today’s bishops, and through their hands to priests and deacons, as well as to laity through confirmation.

 

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Do you teach immersion for the remission of sins as in Acts 2:38 as the way to follow what Jesus tells us to do in order to have a home with him in heaven?

God’s love isn’t something we earn. It is a free gift, given to all, baptized and unbaptized. As Paul said, nothing can separate us from the love of God.

Baptism is one way of connecting ourselves with others who are being loved in that way and joining with them in Christian servanthood. In baptism, we join the Body of Christ and agree to accept the duties, joys and dangers of that affiliation.

Heaven isn’t a prize that we win by being baptized. Heaven, as Jesus described it, is the place where God welcomes all whom he has made.

The Greek word translated as “baptism,” by the way, can mean both “bathe” (as in immerse oneself in water) and “wash” (as in dip one’s hands in water), making unnecessary the long-standing argument about total immersion vs. dipping.

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In my tradition, women are to be quiet. As a woman am I to keep silent just as St Paul said?

Much of the Christian Church’s response to women is lost in ancient mists. Jesus himself had no respect for traditional boundaries against women. He welcomed women to his circle, treated them as equals and as leaders, and apparently had a special relationship with Mary Magdalene. The nature of that relationship is open to speculation, but the fact of it is clear in the Easter scene in John’s Gospel.

Paul is viewed as putting women under more constraint. In fact, his comments about women staying quiet in church referred to a particular group of women who were apparently gossips and troublemakers. He seems to have been celibate himself and recommended that as a preferable life style. His larger teaching on the Christian household was that its members should be “subject to one another” and love each other.

It was the early Church that moved women to the sidelines and declared them unfit for leadership. Why they did that is unknown, although several scholars have speculated on it. In recent changes that have brought women into full participation in church life and leadership, we are simply catching up with where Jesus was 2,000 years ago.

 

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Can you give me counsel concerning a dating relationship leading toward marriage with a Mormon? I attend the Methodist church, but identify myself as a Christian not any certain denomination.

The keys to relationships between people of different religions are, first, openness about expectations and, second, mutual respect.

At some point, you both need to consider what expectations each of you has about ongoing religious affiliation and practice. For example, will he expect you to convert to the Mormon tradition? Will his family have that expectation? Will he be diminished in his church if you don’t convert? What would conversion require of you? And, of course, the expectation questions work the other way, too. Would you expect him to convert to your Christian tradition? And so on. As to practice, if you maintain separate religious affiliations, what are your expectations about spending time in each? Go to your church one week and his the next? Go to separate churches?

If the expectations—conversion, no conversion, time spent in each tradition—seem reasonable to both of you, the matter of mutual respect comes into play. Religion can be divisive, even with families. How will the two of you handle religious differences? Can you each respect the other if different faiths continue?

There are many such questions in forming a relationship. Whether the wife changes her name, whether you expect to have children, how you want to balance work, how you want to handle household duties. Each of these questions can benefit from this same approach: what are your expectations, and can you maintain respect even when you disagree.

 

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Many churches are not especially welcoming. There is a strong feeling of unwelcomeness in a couple I have been in which has put me off. Can you comment on finding a church home?


Yes, many congregations are struggling with basic matters like welcoming people to worship. I think we are still getting over the 1950s, when it was easy to build churches and keep the doors open. Now we need to work hard, work smart, and work creatively. In my opinion, many want to do exactly that work, and many don’t. Some congregations are content to age gracefully and leave the future to someone else. I suspect you can skip churches like that.

There are, however, many congregations that are committed to working hard. You just have to shop around. One way to do that is to see which congregations are mentioned in the newspaper as building Habitat houses, serving at soup kitchens, or holding prayer vigils for victims and violence. A church that is giving its life and substance away is likely to be welcoming of you.

 

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To learn more about Tom Ehrich’s writings, visit www.onajourney.org.
 


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